Marshall Lyles, LPC-S, LMFT-S, RPT-S, EMDRIA Approved Consultant
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​Daydream deconstructed

7/23/2018

3 Comments

 
My daydreams, for years, indulged the fantasy of being granted the super power of invisibility.

That power [invisibility] would bring me safety, control, protection, rest. All in one moment, struggles would be obsolete.

One day, recently, a passing internal question changed the dream. Why is invisibility the solution for insecurity? Beliefs began to unravel and reassemble.

If I get to wish for a supernatural skill set, then I choose to be seen…actually seen….20/20 sightedness that shines light on who I am and how I came to be. Then I, in return, have the power to see the inner workings of those taking in the experience of me. I see their acknowledgement and acceptance or utter lack thereof.

I could continue to wish for retreating into invisibility, but I am then complicit in wishing for others’ blindness. Or I can stand here and insist on seeing and being seen, ending the longstanding game of relational hide and seek.

​Ready or not…
3 Comments
Linda
7/23/2018 06:49:32 pm

Nice to see you writing in public again. So much for invisibility. You have allowed me to see you;and you, me. I’m richer for it.

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Dori link
7/24/2018 12:20:46 pm

Your words resonate. For years, decades really, I attempted to hide, blend, mimic in an attempt to be invisible. Although this felt safer in the moment as I avoided risk, something important within me began to atrophy. Now, in my brave moments, I share and offer myself. Being seen allows me to be loved. Being seen also renews and energizes so I am better able to extend love to others. I am joining you in the supernatural skill of being seen and more deeply seeing those I encounter!

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Jim
8/19/2018 07:33:02 pm

Hi Marshall, I'd like to see, and "see" you sometime. Thank you for your thoughts about...vulnerability?

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    Marshall Lyles

    Reflections on lessons learned from being a therapist and adoptive dad.

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